The Poison Tour Diary via Metal Sludge

Date June 3, 2001 / 805 reads / No comments yet

"Warrant Restrictions"

Oh, geez! O.K., O.K.! I agree, I feel bad for Fuckazo. He does seem like a pretty cool guy and has jumped through some hoops to rectify the situation betwixt him and myself. After all, I extended my hospitality to him in the first place. Miss Perfect Honey 2001 e-mailed me with her number and I called her. She states that she didn't remember him at all but, some dude was pretty cool and helped get her outside to upchuck with less embarrassment. Must have been Fuckazo.
As for the drum, Fuckazo offered to sell it to me pretty cheap. I declined. I am not meant to have it. Bad mojo, me thinks. Consider the feud between Fuckazo and me dropped. I don't have the energy. I have bigger fish to fry as you'll soon see...(Next Diary)

The real reason for the Poison/Warrant feud in the first place... (Just so ya know.)
Back in the day, the reason Warrant got on our shit list was because at the time, the guys from Warrant liked to go to the sound board and watch us during our set. This gave the Warrant fellas an ample chance to pick chicks from the crowd. On one particular day, there were a few people at the sound board when the Warrant posse arrived at the board. One was Bret's mother. Well, Bret's mother was obviously in their way and so, she was ousted from the sound board platform to make room for the boys. Yep, after being asked by Warrant security and her refusing, she was physically removed. Bret came off stage looking for her only to find her crying outside of the building.
Well, the Poison/Warrant war began. After years of filth flying in the press, Jani still won't cop to the real reason why it started, and that is the REAL reason it all began. If you wanna fuck with Bret, don't do it with his family, he doesn't take to that very well. Of course I back him on this and the one thing that takes priority in this band is our honor to each others truest beliefs. If you fuck with one of us, you fuck with all of us. If you punch Bobby, for instance, you may as well have punched all of us. That's the way it is.

Anyway, I'm not trying to drudge up the past, but if you don't know the real reason in the first place, how can you understand why the shit has been flying for so many years. Yes, it should have been resolved, but it simply never was. At various times, several Warrant members have taken pot shots at Poison. The fact that we brought them on this tour is enough to say we are cool about it all. Please, if you think they should be treated like kings out here after all this shit, we simply think giving them the opportunity to get on a great stage every night is enough to say, hey guys, let the past be the past. They aren't suffering. Our merchandise company has explicitly stated that they will not compete with C.D.s and other forms of non concert merchandise from opening acts. So, fuck all you who are bitching about Warrant not being allowed to sell C.D.'s. They are allowed to sell their shirts and shit, if we were truly dicks, they couldn't sell that stuff either. Besides, if you are a Warrant fan, go buy the fuckin' CD at the store or from their web site for Christ sakes! The merch stand isn't a fuckin' record store! Besides, I can't sell my comics either. Same reason. The merch company just needs their world the way they want it. That's life.

The reason Warrant has these so called restrictions is to keep this thing going. We aren't friends, so keeping a little distance makes it work. We have a professional thing worked out so that there isn't a problem. When we toured with David Lee Roth, we had worse restrictions, believe me. Hey, we were stoked to open the show. It was a great opportunity. Bret wasn't allowed to do raps between songs and we got a half hour after the show too. We had to submit a 3-D version of our stage to them for approval and all kinds of shit. Warrant has it fuckin' made compared to the shit Roth put us through. All we got paid was attention and that was in the form of lot lizards in the parking lot in the bus after the show off of the venue's property line. Think I'm kiddin' ya? I ain't!

Anyway, this is less of a diary and more of an explanation, but so what, it needed to be said. No one is pissing and moaning here, but sometimes ya gotta Osplain things Lucy!

Rikki Ricardo Rockett
Bathing in the Heat of Florida Latinas